When we need courage the most is when we begin.
When we’ve obtained safety and abundance and we’re thriving, we have momentum. That momentum says yes, I know I can do hard things, yes, I know I can make changes to my life that I desire, yes, I know I can thrive.
So, when we choose to make another change, to reach for another star, to brave the world with another creative project or art from the depths of our soul, we already have momentum. We already know we can.
It still may be scary, it still may be a leap, it still may be outside of our comfort zone, it still may require courage, but at that time we have the momentum to help push us and the safety net to catch us if we fall.
Once we allow ourselves to experience safety and abundance and to thrive, it becomes easier to continue to allow ourselves to have those things, so that success and happiness and thriving become contagious and exponential – they compound in happiness interest.
But when we’re at the beginning, when we’ve hit rock bottom, when we’re coming out of trauma, we don’t have that momentum.
In fact, we’re actually in a stream of struggle momentum. Without the safety net to catch us. While our limiting beliefs become contagious and exponential – compounding in suffering interest.
The beginning is the hardest because we have to fight for something we’ve never seen before. We have to believe in something we don’t believe in. We have to trust in something we’ve never seen actual living proof of.
We have to look at our long history of struggle and believe that we can have a different future, even though we have no idea how we could ever possibly have that.
And we’re more than likely surrounded by others who are also in struggle momentum. Who are stuck in limiting beliefs. Who are happy to help us tear ourselves down when we desire for more, because they ‘get’ us.
The only hope we have for a better life is imagining one. Creating an imaginary one in our heads. We haven’t seen our life look like anything but struggle, so we have to imagine what it would look like if we were thriving. We have no experience to rely on for examples.
If we need help with our imagination, we look at others who have thriving lives. We can see other examples of what a happy life could look like. To see other examples allows us to expand our minds to at the very least imagine a different life.
But then our minds become an arena of shadow and paradox, because of the unworthiness we feel when we compare ourselves to others, the jealousy we feel that they must have had it easier than we did, the self-hatred we feel when we realize we wish we could just be them instead of us.
Many people at this point would say, the problem is that we don’t accept our lives. We don’t love ourselves and our scars and our wounding. We shouldn’t be trying to change our lives for the better, because no life is better than another. We just need to love ourselves back together and stop desiring a different life.
And I say to that – yes, and…
Embracing our shadows is such an important step. And it’s also okay to desire to step into the light.
Accepting our current life is key to integrating our pieces into wholeness. And someone who has suffered from trauma their entire life absolutely has the right to desire to change that pattern into a new one.
Not because anyone else’s life is any better than theirs. But because we get to be empowered souls with free will on this earth, which means we get to decide to not play by the old rules anymore.
We get to decide to overcome our ancestral trauma.
We get to decide to live life another way.
We get to have desires.
Because if each of us were truly living a life that we desired from the depths of our heart and our soul, no two people would be living the same life. It would be impossible. We are all, each of us, so very different with very different desires on our hearts, that living a life we desire actually does not mean copying someone else’s life.
Living a life we desire means adding individuality, creativity, and authentic expression to a planet that so direly needs it. It means plumbing the depths of our traumas and shadows for our unique gifts and experiences to bring to the world.
And it means allowing ourselves to experience the other end of the spectrum of emotions that has been quite foreign to many of us deep in the struggle stream.
So, let me state this clearly – when you’ve lived a life deep in suffering and shadow, there is nothing wrong with desiring a life of love and light.
All of it begins within us. With our decision to choose courage.
To choose courage when we make decisions that are outside of our normal behavior patterns.
To choose courage to keep going when others don’t like that we’re acting outside of our normal behavior patterns.
To choose courage to set clear boundaries.
To choose courage to take a leap of faith.
To choose courage when we fail, to dust ourselves off, get back up, and try again.
To choose courage to think a new thought.
To choose courage to love ourselves through our shadows and through our new desires.
To choose courage to constantly come back to check in with our heart and with our soul on our next steps.
It may feel like we’re trying to do a 180 degree turn with the Titanic ship in turning our life around.
And it’s because we are. We are literally taking momentum going in one direction and not only stopping it, but turning it around and then pushing to start in a new direction. If it’s been feeling like a lot of effort, it’s because it is.
We are literally rewiring our brain, our body, our emotions, and our energetic aura to all function differently than they have our entire lives. And we’re likely doing it in the face of stress, pressure, unsupportive relationships, societal judgment, and maybe even deep feelings of unsafety and lack of security.
And unfortunately, no one is going to do this for you.
Fortunately, you are entirely capable of doing this.
Humans are amazingly resilient, adaptable, transformative, and capable of neuroplasticity and brain to body healing, among other things that quantum physicists talk about and that we likely haven’t even discovered about ourselves yet.
We can use our thoughts, our feelings, and our bodies, to change both our actions in the world and our energetic auras which determine what comes in vibrational resonance with our field.
We can overcome the struggle. We can decide to no longer live in suffering. We can turn that Titanic ship around 180 degrees and push forward to create a new momentum.
It takes an immense amount of courage.
Luckily, you have an infinite amount of courage just waiting inside of you, simply because you are a human.
Choose courage, be brave with your life.