As I said in Part 1, this blog is not about getting rich quick, how to make six figures in six months, or how to beat the system. This is about you finding your fulfillment and satisfaction in pursuing your soul’s desires.
This is a really important point. Our soul’s desires are different from our ego’s desires. And if you wait until you’ve ‘made it’ or you have more money or more time to then focus on your soul’s desires, you’re missing the whole point.
Our ego is the part of us that has been conditioned throughout our life. Because of the materialist society we live in, rooted in fear and scarcity and achievement, the ego wants more no matter what – more money, more house, more things, more status, more influence, more perceived success, etc.
Whatever our society values, is what our ego has been taught to value, which is why many people spend much of their lives living the rat race of trying to ‘keep up’ and keep seeking the next benchmark before they will allow themselves to finally slow down and enjoy their life. Except that time never comes, because there’s always a new benchmark.
We are a wildly adaptable species. Which is why, not only can we be resilient and adapt to poverty or crisis, but we can very quickly adapt to higher income, which means we always want more.
This is why there are some people with millions of dollars that are terribly unhappy and some people who continue to struggle to make money and also feel unhappy.
When our measure of happiness is reliant on society’s perceived values, what has accrued cultural status, rather than our innermost desires, then we will never be able to feel lasting, satisfying, soul-deep fulfillment.
Our soul knows what desires are true at our deepest essence. It may be becoming a millionaire and being famous and having lots of money. But it may not be.
I’m not knocking wanting to be more rich than you can imagine. It’s just that we’ve assigned value judgments and cultural status to certain desires over others, so our ego wants that instead of what we actually might want deep down.
In fact, some people know they don’t really want a lot of money, but because that’s what’s being taught everywhere, they think they should want it, and the more they don’t achieve it, the more they feel unsuccessful and like a perceived failure.
When we pursue our ego’s desires based on our conditioning, not only will we not be fulfilled, but our soul will continue to try and bring us back into alignment, meaning all of our neglected shadows will come out to play.
Every time we suppress an authentic soul-deep desire, we are pushing a part of our truth into the metaphorical closet. The more of our truth that we push into the closet, the more shadowy and twisty those parts of our selves become, until they’ve become full-blown shadow monsters, subconsciously self-sabotaging us at every turn.
But when we pursue the desires that live deep within our soul, regardless of whether they have cultural status or are considered high value by others, we’ll be so fucking fulfilled and happy, that none of that will matter.
So, how do we do that? We have to deprogram and decondition ourselves from believing the truths we’ve been fed from outside ourselves that don’t sit right with our internal truth.
First, it takes getting to know your intuition, the gut feeling that tells you when something is just not right, or the pull you feel towards doing something, even if it’s illogical or you don’t know why.
Intuition is located in the body rather than the mind. So testing different truths that you know the answer to (like your name) and examining how each one feels in your body can tell you what your inner truth feels like.
Then, every time you come up to a belief that you’ve always assumed to be true, take a moment to re-examine it. Let’s say you’ve always believed you needed to live in your home state, or you’ve always believed you needed to make over $100,000, or you’ve always believed you needed to be a lawyer.
Any belief that has been an assumption for you – write it out and re-examine it. Is this actually true for you? What other possibilities are true for you? When you consider each different possibility, what feels intuitively true? Your mind is following the patterns of the ego, but how does your body feel when considering each one?
There are people that live happily all over the world, people that live happily at all different income levels, and people that live happily in all different kinds of professions. Allowing yourself to open up to possibilities you hadn’t before considered can be truly eye-opening.
Here’s an example. After spending 7 years in schooling, getting a law degree, carrying an expensive load of student loan debt, and working for 4 years in a legal profession in state government, I finally allowed myself to consider the possibility of not working in the legal profession.
There was so much conditioning weighing against me – society and family and friends wondering why I would ‘waste my law degree’, ‘throw my education down the toilet’, ‘take such a risk’, etc. etc.
But when I allowed myself to tune all of that out, and to feel into my heart, and to listen to my innermost soul’s truth, I knew that I was ready to leave the legal profession behind me to pursue what I actually desired for my life. Which was a nomadic lifestyle – being brave and doing good work in the world.
And of course my law degree comes in handy, because I learned so much! Truly, nothing is ever a waste. But sometimes, following our soul’s desires means swimming against the current of our culture and society’s standards.
And that’s what I want for every single one of you! For you to be brave enough to follow your soul’s desires, rather than the desires that have been handed to you.
Stay tuned for Part 5 of the Business Intro Series.